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brinepools:

reasons I can relate to a possum:

-tired & unkempt, smells weird
-emotions ranging from “displeased” to “existential scream”
-no work ethic
-lies around looking dead when overwhelmed
-will eat trash & live amongst trash if left to own devices
-sometimes you feel bad and feed it a sandwich

(via joshpeck)

eaoaia:

postmodernism:

I don’t know why Frank insisted on bringing me to this dinner party, I don’t even know what to talk about and everyone’s already having a conversation, it’d be awkward to butt in. A steakhouse? Really? I’m a pescetarian, Frank. We’ve known each other ten years. Nobody’s even bothered to comment on my coat or offered a tummy rub. Your friends are shit, Frank.

my favorite post of 2013

eaoaia:

postmodernism:

I don’t know why Frank insisted on bringing me to this dinner party, I don’t even know what to talk about and everyone’s already having a conversation, it’d be awkward to butt in. A steakhouse? Really? I’m a pescetarian, Frank. We’ve known each other ten years. Nobody’s even bothered to comment on my coat or offered a tummy rub. Your friends are shit, Frank.

my favorite post of 2013

(via grandboischeriludenberg)

asheathes:

I can’t stop singing praises to Emma Watson even if I tried like in one single speech she not only advocated for women to be treated equally as men but also touched on the fact that men are also victims of gender inequality while also acknowledging the fact that she is already incredibly privileged

All of the haters can just sit the fuck down because she just killed the game of life

(via maliciousmelons)

punkwarren:

striderdaves:

i love catfish so much because they act like theyre fbi agents or something when theyre really just using reverse google image search

i thought you meant the animal and let me tell you that was a wild minute of me trying to figure out the psychology of fish thinking they’re federal law enforcement

(via guy)

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